Begin here, begin now

Happy Memorial Day! I have to tell you that I am so excited to have this day off-- it was much needed. Thanks to all the troops out there, including in my own family. Thanks for all you do and all you have done.

Also- little shout out to my mother whose birthday is tomorrow. Greatest mom ever-- thank you, too.

So, this week was the conclusion to my young women book group at church. It was such a great experience. During our last session we ended by talking about what we feel like we have changed and what we still need to work on since being in the group. I think whenever we are confronted with this type of question, I think that our natural response is to point out the one or two things that we have put in to practice well and then a list of things we want to do better. I feel like I need to read the whole book over again (we were reading Heart to Heart-- designed for groups).

In response to this, one of the girls was talking about a sermon from a church in NY where the pastor was talking about how to take control of your life and get you to where you want to be (I'm still trying to find the exact one on the website so that I can read the whole thing. If I do- I'll post it). He gave 10 different bits of advice, saying that we ALL have a list of things that we feel we still need to improve/accomplish. The first two were "begin here" and "begin now"--basically, the short of it being that you can't go back and change anything and we are not usually in a position where there is absolutely nothing that we don't have going for us, but you do have to take that step. Life is going to keep going. It may be a small step, but then you take another.

I related to this a lot in that I feel like I go through these phases where I am ready to revamp how I prioritize my life. Usually this starts with a list and I decide that I will just "start over". I try starting eighty bajillion things all at the same time and then get frustrated when I tap out because I can't get a handle on it all. The reality is that we will never be wholly satisfied for where we are in our lives, nor should we be since we always will have room to grow to be a better person. This does not mean, however, that we haven't accomplished a lot or that improvement is out of reach (no baby and the bath water kind of thing).

So, I'm going to try to be a little more forgiving with myself (for example, I'm really proud of myself for sticking it out in a 9 month book group- yay!)and take it one improvement at a time (creating 1 or 2 more good habits- not 20) and begin right where I am, right now. That being said- I'm off to the pool for a little me time ;)-- happy day ya'll.

Race For the Cure June 12th

Help me run Race for the Cure June 12th!

http://nctriangle.info-komen.org/site/TR/RacefortheCure/DUR_NCTriangleAffiliate?px=7206183&pg=personal&fr_id=1702&refresh=1

We all have someone close to us who has had or been affected by this disease. Let's do our part to help find a cure, even if it is just wishing me good luck-- thanks!

How long til my soul gets it right?

They're still alive! Amazing... I always have such a hard time with plants--mostly because they don't tell me what they need--are you hungry? Do you need more sun? Less? OH! you're still there... forgot--since you make no noise.

Sometimes lately I feel like this is how I treat areas of my life. I feel like there are always so many things that I should be managing. How's my financial portfolio (or lack thereof)? Which people have I not contacted in an absurd amount of time? Have I made all of my yearly doctor's appointments, crap... I haven't worked out in three days. Yet, like my plants, these things aren't screaming for me to update them, contact them, etc. Sometimes I feel like I am scrambling just to keep it all afloat--watering areas of my life when they start to wilt rather than regularly tending to them so that wiltage (yeah, I made that word up) isn't even a possibility.

And props to all you parents out there-- how do you have the energy, much less the memory, to be taking care of all of these things for you AND your kids... although, at least they tell you when they need food.

Anyway, I can't say that I have this particular issue figured out. I'll let you know when I do... in the meantime, I'm going to go water the plants.

The fate of Education

So, a few weeks ago I attended the County Commissioners meeting to discuss cuts to education in the coming year. I know it has been awhile, but I still feel the need to discuss what happened since it will definitely be affecting us next year.

I was so impressed and inspired by all the people that spoke and told their stories. It was also extremely scary to realize the impact that this will have on our educators and our children.

Here is basically what I said during the meeting:

I have been a counselor in the public schools for three years and I am begging you not to cut education this year.
Now I know that it is extremely difficult to balance a budget on a deficit. Trust me, in the absence of my experience pay and spontaneous furlough funds being taken out of my paycheck, I have experience-- even if it is on a smaller scale.
I came to North Carolina to get my degree as a counselor from one of the best schools in the nation- the University of North Carolina. I fell in love with this area and have worked with the best teachers I have ever seen.
I came in to this profession at the beginning of these cuts and I have had a case load of over 500 students- 10 to 15 in our middle school for three years. As the economy has suffered, our children suffer. I have never seen so many children with so many needs in my life--ranging from homelessness to depression to suicidal ideation and child abuse. But for these students, school is one of the few places they can go to feel safe and see a future.
As these classrooms grow and their needs become more severe, we are left with not more help, but more cuts. And it is not just in our building but also those services outside our school that we need to help our kids.
On a personal note, I have also held four jobs for the past two years (one of which was cut this year) in order to try and keep myself afloat--to pay for the job that I wanted to do. Needless to say, the effect is not only felt in the classroom, but at home.
I tell these children every day-education is their ticket. This is their ticket to the life they want to live, the things they want to have-- the ability to choose the job they want, not one that is chosen for them.
Please do not make this an empty promise--please do not make me a liar.

I seriously worry about what will happen to our kids. This is the foundation of our society and the most important thing for our children. I just hope that people will listen and that not just the educators will speak up for what is happening to our community.

Spring is on it's way...

A second entry! Progress... It could be the copious amounts of free coffee I have consumed while getting my car repaired this morning, or the fact that I am hopefully healing pretty well after surgery, but I am feeling pretty productive today.

I'm so excited to see the little glimpses of spring around. I'm done with snow and winter, so I am purposefully ignoring the inevitable coldness that will return in the coming months as the temperatures rise and fall on a semi-daily basis.

Anyway, I am really lucky to have such great friends and family- both of which were so helpful while being couch-ridden for a week (and the last few months). I have been reading Bitter is the New Black, a gift from a good friend. I haven't laughed this hard from a book in a long time. It's brilliant.



It also makes me wonder about my own dreams about creating my own business. I don't know how many people I have talked to about starting a bakery or cafe. Maybe if we all moved in to the same city it would be more possible-- or if I knew more about starting a business and had the super important first step--$$$.

Until that point (if it ever comes to be), I can still enjoy the work.

So this blog was created over a year ago...

So I created this blog over a year ago and have yet to write my true thoughts down. Fear of writing things of no consequence? yes... Fear of getting in trouble for what I actually want to write? yesss... To think it's silly that I would even be that important for it to even matter? yeah... that, too.

Regardless, (not irregardless--thanks J, had my own argument about that with someone last night), I am loving being updated on other people's lives, even those who I talk to on a regular basis, about things that I may miss day to day. Given recent events and the fact that people I love are literally located coast to coast (and sometimes around the world), I think this may be a cool way of keeping in touch with each other and sharing what's going on in our worlds.

So while this is not a revolutionary start, hopefully I will continue to think about really taking advantage of this opportunity.

We'll see....